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From:
Jason Newman
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Sunday, April 18, 2021
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Here we are, more than a year later and amidst all of the turmoil of the world, I find myself here at 2am on a Random Sunday morning thinking of you. I think mostly of the last time we spoke. It was so difficult making that call knowing it would be the last. I knew you would be strong, and downplay what you were going through. I drew courage from your stand, enough to tell you something that I don't just throw around in this life. I told you I loved you and that'll have to be enough. The lost time and missed opportunities haunt me on nights like this. 13 year old me didn't understand when you called my Papaw's house on one summer day and offered to take me into your home because you knew that I was not in any kind of stable environment. Of course, 13 year old Jason had no idea what kind of sacrifice that was and rejected it out of fear of change. Now that I've had to take in my Little Brother who is suffering from horrendous disabilities in the wake of my Mom's death do I realize just how much you and Aunt Julia, along with Christine and Melanie were offering me that day. It was priceless. Now, hindsight being 20/20 I wouldn't change anything because of the priceless family I have now, both extended through my wife and the addition of Noah, but it's because of what you cultivated with your life that I was given a roadmap for my own future. I got out of Concordia Parish, and no matter what happened, how many times I failed, I got up off the mat and stared the future in the face and wouldn't quit. That was 100% Donnie Newman...I love my Father, your Brother but he had his own demons and destiny and at this late date, I don't think they include me and that's fine because I had you and Papaw Newman....and some great in laws for the past near 20 years. I don't know why tonight was the night for this, I'm working on Ancestry right now...maybe that's it. I can't do anything about the missed connections of the past but my Son is going to grow up knowing where he came from. He'll know you. Continued rest in heaven, I know the deer are just trembling since you arrived...love and peace....
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